Da Guy Wit Da Yellow Hair
Political Satire By James E. Horn

Dis guy with yellowish blond hair who grew up in NewYawk City walked up to da podium at da Useless Nations, aka da United Nations General Assembly and give a speech dat put da world on notice. He told everyone dere: “As President of the United States, I will always put America first, just like you, as the leaders of your countries will always, and should always, put your countries first.” Hey Barak, you chump: Dat ain’t no JV team apology there. Dis born in da USA President is da Real Deal. Da lefties went into a dither squalling that dis honesty (dey called it a defiant warning) shocked delegates. Good for da Donald!
Mindja now, on November 8th, 2016, Donald Trump was elected President of dese Sovereign United States by a clear majority of genuinely legitimate voters (called deplorables by da bitter looser, queen Hillary). Anybody who claims differently is full of something that I’d love to kick outta ya. Got it?
Twitter was his favorite tool and it still is to get his messages, challenges, digs, and more out dere because the commie-pinko news media only shills for dem what hate America. Trump’s up front honesty and frankness doesn’t embarrass him, it humbles and humiliates dem swamp dwelling schmucks.
Donald J. Trump made billions in his chosen business in the toughest city in America by dealing successfully and winning over all manner of schmucks, shills, sly shysters, crooks, gangstas, pimps, union slime, drug dealers, chumps, rip-off artists, and human dregs. He’s da champ! He’s smart.
People on his staff were dere for da speeh – and some, like General Kelly who soon covered his mug (dat face hiding ploy is a clear and open signal of disloyalty to da President and showed Kelly’s disgust of da boss) when da President disobeyed da Kelly gang’s orders and diverted from da speech dey told him ta make. (Kelly is a taritor to Trump and needs to go.) Yeah, da Prez said what really needed to be said and da Prez hit a home run right outta da park with his plain spoken truths. That’s what great men do! He clearly laid it out to da world, especially da cheese eating rocket man punk in NoKo, da dictator in Venezuela, da chumps-in-charge in Iran, and a whole bunch of others.
It’s no surprise dat da NewYawk Times and other phony rags like the WaPo and HuffPo went berserk. Dodos like Dianne Feinstein and queen Hillary, spewed their prejudiced, b iogoted invective on him. Even da moron foreign minister of Venezuela “insulted” President Trump by comparing da great President Ronald Reagan. Hah!
President Trump reminded folks present that “thousands and thousands of our courageous citizen heroes have paid the ultimate price to defend the freedom of many of dose nations represented in dat hall”. President Trump reminded all dat we have been carrying their water for a long time, too darned long for some: We provided the aid that kept the communist wolves from the door in Japan, South Korea, and Western Europe. We won da Cold War, and nobody can count how many we’ve fed and cared for in every corner of dis round world..
We also whupped Saddam and bin Laden’s al Qaeda while many UN members worked against us behind our backs. We have yet to take the treacherous Saudis to task for 9/11 (remember that 28 pages from the 9/11 report pertaining to the Saudis are being kept from the American people).
President Trump remined the nations of Africa (again) that they need to get involved in fixing things over there. Suggestion: Begin by sitting down with the map of Africa and erase the lines that the colonial Europeans drew, and then re-draw the borders along traditional African tribal and cultural lines. This will give genuine pride of nationhood to so many. Stop Moslem slaving and protect your people from the Islamists like the CAR and a few others are doing.
While President Trump pointed out that we’ve being carrying their water and paying their bills for too long and that this one-way flow of cash will end; and that members need to pay up (or get out). [Me, I hope he tells the City of New York to tag and tow illegally parked diplomats’ cars and sell them at auction if their accumulated ($200,000,000 for everyone) in unpaid parking fees aren’t paid off, and that no new license plates for replacement vehicles will be issued in any state or the District of Columbia until this is done.]

Donald J. Trump is on track to be the greatest President of the Sovereign United States of America in many decades.